Parent of the Year

The award for awesome parenting at our house this week definitely goes to Ren. And given how spacey I am and how often I blow it, this is saying something. Ren earned this esteemed award because in one brief instant, he brought the reality of the epipen to life for all three kids. And for that, I will be eternally grateful. And, by "eternally grateful," I mean "WTH, Ren?!?"

We've had an epipen for awhile, and, peripherally anyway, Pink P knows we might have to use it if she ingests any peanuts. But, until yesterday, she didn't really grasp how an epipen works. This was intentional, of course. The last thing I want if Pink P experiences anaphylaxis is for her to panic about getting a shot. You try explaining to a five-year old that the shot will be a lot better than, oh, I don't know, DEATH.

We've always talked about it in only the vaguest terms: "If you accidentally eat a peanut and can't breathe, we'll use this to make you feel better while we take you to the hospital." Or, "We have to take this with us everywhere we go so we can to keep you safe." And I have to say, the whole peanut allergy/epipen thing was going pretty well. Pink P was aware of the need to avoid peanuts at all cost, but she wasn't scared about anything.

That is until Ren inadvertently injected himself.

And then screamed.

To his credit, he tried to regain control of the situation by a) claiming it didn't hurt (really, Pink P, it didn't hurt, not at all) and b) by being super silly and enacting an overly dramatic death.

But, neither kid was fooled. Not one bit. Probably because it clearly hurt. And also because before he claimed it didn't hurt and before he enacted his dramatic death he called out to me in a slightly panicked voice (see what happens when I leave the room to go to the bathroom?). And, we all know I'm not the calm, rational one in this relationship.

In case you're wondering, accidental epipen injections into fingers and toes are more common that you might expect. Ren "shot himself" (as Pink P puts it) when he was throwing away an old one and trying to properly dispose of the medicine inside. (I suppose that's one way to get rid of it). In 3% of the cases, the injection can cause blood vessels to constrict and stop blood flow to the digit (Thanks interwebs, I didn't have enough to worry about, what with the back and the shoulder--have I told you guys about Ren's shoulder? It will probably need to be replaced in the next year, so, yeah, I'd prefer Ren didn't also lose a finger).

My initial internet search indicated we needed to go to the ER ASAP. But, a certain Japanese man I know is not going to the ER no way, no how. Of course, it was a holiday, and no doctor was in, so I called the pharmacy. Fortunately, the pharmacist didn't say anything about lost fingers, but he did point out the risk of soft tissue infection and suggest we go to the ER to get a strong antibiotic. Awesome (see earlier sentence about Ren and ERs).

In the end, we did nothing.*** Ren spent most of the day staring at/feeling his thumb, mesmerized by how it felt. And, after about 24 hours, it seems back to normal.

Pink P, on the other hand, is traumatized for life.



***We do not, however, condone you doing nothing. You should probably make better choices than we do. If this isn't evident to you by now, you obviously haven't been reading my blog posts very closely.

My Life in Pictures

Sometimes I just need to share the visual history of my day.

First, there's this:

Sky drew a comic for you. It was about a guy who had a dream that he was stuck in a maze and needed TNT to blow himself out. I could have posted that comic, but it isn't nearly as interesting as the "The Pocket 2000." In Sky's words, this nifty doodad has "two pockets with a hole that you put things into so they can fall out. It has jokes, pictures, and tells you what age it's good for. It's the perfect gift for just about everyone."

I'll let you decide for yourself.

This is pretty self-explanatory. You put in the coin and it slides through. You shouldn't use non-coins or the second hole. If your coin gets stuck, you tip left. Duh.

This side has the games. There is a knock-knock joke, a lift flap, an illustrated guide to making paper airplanes, and even a place for you to practice spelling Sky's name.

Lift the flap and find another joke. I mean, who wouldn't want one of these? Maybe we can mass produce them.

Sky has really been into making these pockets lately, so mass production is a definite possibility. In fact, if you'd like one (or thirty), let me know, and I'll hook you up. I'm wondering, though, should I be concerned that some of Sky's best creations, like this one, are made while he's at school?

Then, there are these:

We've started cleaning out and reorganizing in preparation for our upcoming move (la, la, la, if I cover my ears and sing loud, can I just pretend it's not true?). In the process, I discovered some stationery I bought in Japan several years ago. I still have it because I can't bear to mail it to anyone. It's just too awesome.

"Seeking a Little Dream: I wish to sing a duet with transparent time. A dream makes evolution. Dreams come before I know.  I wish to grow my small dream. Play with dreams!" It's like this stationery can read my mind. I
want to sing a duet with transparent time, and I totally think dreams should make evolution! 

"Toilet*Panda: If only I have this." I know the disembodied panda faces are pretty cool, but do you know what's the coolest about this stationery? It includes memo paper that dissolves in water. Stationery that doubles as toilet paper? Priceless.

Lest you think that the odd stationery is limited to English-language products, here are a couple of Japanese sets I bought.

Because nothing says, "Hi, how are you?" Like two middle school kids awkwardly eating school lunch.

In case you need to practice reading your signs. I could translate them, but it's more fun to let you guys try to figure it out.

It turns out I have a drawer full of gems like these. I feel pretty silly moving them from house to house. I suppose I should write some letters just to spread the joy.