How Does He Love, Me? Let Me Count the Ways

Last year for  Valentine's Day, I recounted the story of how Ren and I met and ended up getting married. You  can read  that story here, here, here, and here (What can I say? It's such a good story, I had to tell it in 4 parts.)

This year's Valentine's post is appropriately titled: How Does He Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways. I've already established that Ren is an unconventional romantic (link).  He's certainly no Browning (see what I did there? A literary reference), but it seems he is a pretty typical Japanese man (In fact, just as I was writing this, NPR ran a story--link --substantiating my claim. Amazing timing!). According to Ren, saying "I love you" too much is the surest sign your relationship is in trouble. True love is  understood and needn't be spoken. A friend of mine was with her boyfriend/husband for 5 years before he said the words, "I love you," and even then, he only said it once. Compared to that, Ren's a regular Don Juan. Not only does he say, "I love you" from time to time, he also makes unmistakably romantic gestures. Let me count them for you:

Number 1:

He always fixes my computer problems, even when I am having the same self-inflicted crisis for the fourth time, and it will take days and a complete reinstallation to undo my mess. Usually he will do this without sleeping.

Number 2:

Each morning, he hands me an apple slice when I'm on my way out the door. I'm pretty sure he does it because he knows eating breakfast could actually help me shed my post-partum spare tire, but I like to imagine he does it because he loves me that much.

Number 3:

He let's me write about him in my blog even though he'd much prefer his privacy.

Number 4:

He only buys half of the things he sees on sale instead of all of them. Sure we end up with skeletons in our study, but so far, no other body parts (link).

Number 5:

When Sky is having a total meltdown  and yelling at me for the umpteenth time, Ren drops what he's doing and distracts him with stories of dinosaurs or outer space. 

Number 6:

Not once has he complained when I've left him home alone with the kids while I go have a drink with friends or to work at my office or to shop frantically for something that fits and still looks professional (link).

Number 7:

He doesn't care that I can beat him in most ball sports but that I hate to cook. One of these skills is highly useful around the house. The other is not.

Number 8:
He no longer grumbles when I scratch the car. 

Number 9:
He cooks, cleans, does laundry, makes the bed, vacuums, and changes 90% of Stow's diapers, all while his back hurts and his legs are partially numb. And somehow he manages to do this without making me feel guilty for leaving all the backbreaking work to him.

Number 10:
He once bought me an insulated Pyrex dish and a snow cone maker in the same year. And when I defended my dissertation, he offered to buy me diamonds. Both times, I was moved by the gesture. The second time, I opted for a new phone instead of jewelry, and he was totally cool with that. 


Here's hoping your Valentine knows you as well as mine knows me!